Harlem Ain’t For Amateurs: Girl-fight!

So, as I was walking to Key Food this morning, I witnessed two women yelling at each other.  I’m saddened to report that at 9:30 am (i.e. FULL daylight) one of the women pulled down her jeans and panties (mid-rant) and -sigh- relieved herself right there on the curb.  It gets worse.  She was holding a parking meter for balance with her massive bare butt facing traffic and she was squatting at the bumper of a car that three of her completely unfazed male friends were leaning against. I shudder to think that the car might have belonged to one of them. Better still, while she’s peeing, she is also alternately spitting on the sidewalk and yelling at the other woman.  The other woman was closer to me so I heard her end of the conversation better.  Some of the highlights: “Don’t be telling the police about my food stamps, b*tch!”; “You better be glad I came to get your a*s outta jail!”; and my fave, “You better be glad I got 25-to-life on parole or I’d shoot ya a*s!”  The curb woman, let’s call her, was too distracted by anger to adequately pull herself back together after taking a leak so, for a few moments, she actually waddled down the block while completely exposed from her knees to her bellybutton. Lovely image, I know.  Saddest of all, I think the two women were a couple. Isn’t love grand?

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The website for SékouWrites, a NY-based writer who "day-lights" at SimplyRides.com.